As I am learning day by day to be an ambassador of God’s love there is one fact that stands very clear to me: the things that we take for granted are things we miss when they are gone. I apologize if this sounds like a golden-age’ish trip to the past, but I assure you there is a revelation for you.
Starting out in my childhood I never really realized (and we typically do not as kids) how good life really was. Having little responsibility and having the only worries of what that note said that was passed at school was definitely a care-free time in my life. Sports were great…well…playing sports with an energy that did not run out was great! Christmas was a different experience as a child than an adult; for I can honestly say that the look on my face when I got presents I wanted let me know what pure glee felt like. I never knew that the experiences I would have with my family that we would seemingly be rushing through would be moments that I would give anything to have had more time in. There were people that I got to be around that were such a joy to my life that have passed away as I have gotten older. What I would not give for that chance to thank them with the same love they have shown me.
Moving on into my teenage years I plainly see my attitude was always objective with rebellious actions and always wanting more. I got what I wanted and thought I was entitled to it, as if being totally irresponsible and ungrateful were not enough in my opinion to deserve it. And even though my teenage years had a lot of bad decisions involved I am happy to say that there were some people that still attempted to invest in me. I had 3 teachers I specifically remember that took the time to make sure they knew I cared. I still remember their names and faces and now know what it was they were trying to do for me. I remember beginning to pay attention in church and seeing people do things that went completely against my outlooks and perspectives of things I thought were true as I was discovering life for myself. Yet there were those who still loved me even when who I thought I was changed all the time. Those people have never left my heart and I am so grateful that I was taught by example about what it means to love through God’s love.
I guess it would be safe to say that I am about in the mid-point in my adult life now. I’m not sure how much more time God will give me to live. Since I have been saved and delivered from my addictions life has totally changed. Something else changed: the numerous amount of people that were as a support around me began to let up little by little. I began to wonder if it was something that I had done to have people start only calling when they were in need of something. I thought I must have surely done something wrong to get in a situation where I always gave and never received a return. I went my entire life knowing one way and now was lost in this part of the journey. The one thing I had to learn in what seemed like the hard way at first was that God was there all along! I then began to learn about how much help I could have through God, that it was so much more than just knowing you had salvation. There was a relationship with God that began to bloom in my life that began to feel just like the people that were around me in my past. And now more than ever I now understand that this stage was a transition to God’s full purpose for my life. There are people now, as I have stepped into the faith, that are in great need of that person that will love through God’s love. Sure I could be sad about losing all of the loved ones and experiences I have had, but I now know why I ever got to feel the good times to begin with. It is now my time to pay it forward.
This ministry and the calling God has on my life was built by every good memory, good experience, and good person that invested in all of our lives. We were being built by people who had the love of God that wanted the best for us. When I really think about that my heart goes out for so many. I could never repay them all, just as much as I could ever fathom of repaying God’s free pardon of sin and love that has been shown to me. God’s love for all of us is shown to us so that we not only know God but show that same love in kind to others. It is so important to not stay selfish and always looking to find more for you. As you grow up and mature in your life God can teach you how to change from being selfish to selfless. In closing this thought I now know beyond a shadow of a doubt that the things I always took for granted are things that I wish I could get back. And though I cannot get back what I had I can still give out of what I had received. That is where the bible all of a sudden opened up to me like a flood and these verses hit me like I had just read it for the very first time.
1 John 4-7-11
[7] Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God.
[8] He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.
[9] In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him.
[10] Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.
[11] Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another.